Wal-Mart Woes

Ever go to the grocery store with a list in hand thinking it would be a quick errand? You walk in with a determination to get only the designated items on your list and quickly escape the shopping madness. Only to discover that 37 minutes have already passed and you are wondering aimlessly up and down aisles with a vacant expression on your face. You find yourself pondering the validity of the "AS SEEN ON TV" items as you pass and discovering items that you never knew you needed but suddenly you do. I, myself, am a constant meander-er (is that a word?) of Wal-Mart despite my best efforts to control myself. More than once (or dozen or so times) I have found myself going down aisles I have never before even considered. I don't need car air fresheners that look like trees or cartoon characters nor do I need a sweater for the cat. But sometimes it can't be helped. I have prepared somewhat extensively to prevent the shopping phenomena I term the "shopping black hole." I take in a list, have a budget, and I do NOT get a cart. If I cannot carry it out, then I don't need it. But on occasion you will still see me. You will know me by the vacant, somewhat lost expression on my face. Sometimes I am barely struggling to hang on the the many, many items in my arms while reading the label on the back of a box or searching for a coupon (Yes, I am a faithful coupon clipper) in my pocket. I'm always stalled out at the dairy section for at least 10 minutes while I try to remember if we need milk or not. Occasionally, against my better judgement, I bring along an accomplice--or as he likes to think of it--a hostage. The husband valiantly tries to deter you from buying anything not on the list. Then one of three things happens:
1. He actually succeeds in his efforts, and you are in and out of the store in 20 minutes--10 if the list is split in two, add 5 minutes if he has to find you meandering around the store again.
2. He doesn't succeed and follows you around while making sure you know he's bored and annoyed by sighing every so often. He may eventually leave you to your own devices while he goes to find a chair or bench to sit in. You possibly might find him in the automotive section or magazine section.
3. He doesn't succeed but instead decides to join you. Now instead of two hands, you have four and the shopping time now more than doubles because he wants to "meander" up the automotive section or the magazine section.
I'm still trying out new methods to somehow avoid the "shopping black hole." And yes I have tried avoiding going to Wal-Mart altogether. Invariably it ends in disaster. I either have to go to two or three stores to find all that was on the list or I send Matt which means a dozen phone calls to make sure the right brand or flavor gets purchased or to add much needed but previously forgotten items. I know what you are thinking, but other stores are no better. Will keep trying and report back.